liberation through curiosity
Develop your capacity for self-inquiry and begin reclaiming your life
collage by Heather Hanson
Self-Inquiry. A capacity to look and see, what drives your decision making? Have you ever noticed as you were moving through your day, what was the motivating factor behind your actions? All of your actions?
I'm talking from the smallest ones: like putting makeup on before popping by my studio on a Sunday afternoon, to arguably more impactful ones: why am I not showing up to paint in my studio today when this is how I earn my living?
The Examples
Let's take the first one: makeup and popping out to the studio. I need to go into work, grab some paint and brushes to bring home. But... I don't feel like doing all of the things to get ready: the shower, the hair, the makeup, the clothes. So do I stay home or go in?
How many times have I simply stayed, because it felt like too much work to "get ready." And what? Because I was afraid someone would "see" me without my "face" on? Did I really allow that to stop me from doing something I wanted, no needed, to do? Yes. and Yes. and Yes.
Now the next one: not showing up to the canvas.
Why not show up?
My inner dialogue goes something like this: Well, I could say I had to work on the computer. Or that I needed to clean the house. Then why not paint at home, around my computer? Well then I need all of the things: the perfect setup.
Why do you need all of the things? Don’t you really just need a single tube of paint, a brush, a piece of paper and some water? And couldn't you do that on your kitchen table?
Well, yes and yes. But then it will just be an ugly nothing and what’s the point? Well, you always tell everyone the process is the point.
Exit the dialogue: Then what’s the real reason? My fear that I won’t be able to. That my talent disappeared like a thief in the night. That the next time I pick up the brush then “poof!” It’s gone like magic.
The Power of Curiosity
collage by Heather Hanson
And voila!
Limiting beliefs illuminated by the power of curiosity.
In both cases, my curiosity elucidated the root cause of my (in)actions: fear.
In the first: fear that people would see me and think, ugh, really? Why didn't she just stay home? or at least have the decency to put some makeup on?
In the second, fear that I had no talent. That I wouldn't be able to do "it" again, that I would face my inner dialogue at the canvas and have to hear, really? That mark? That color? This is just a mess. Who do you think you are?
Who wins in both cases? Fear.
But think of this (more questions):
What could happen if I allowed myself to actually shed the conditioning, unlearn the behaviour and tell fear to take a hike? A very real chance at success? Affirmation? Self-Worth? Love?
Why This is Important
Because most of what drives us is fear. It's so embedded we can't even see it. It lives in the smallest of actions. It's in each time we don't speak up in a meeting and ask the question. It's in the dead-end job we believe is all we're good for. It's in the repetitive actions we take on auto-pilot each day because we never stopped to ask why. And it's in the so-called "good for us" policies we are fed and expected to accept because curiosity has been conditioned out of us.
And ultimately it is in the chains that bind us which the power of inquiry would begin to loosen.
Developing a robust capacity for self-inquiry is the first step in liberating yourself. It isn't always pleasant, but it is always illuminating, and ultimately helpful. And psst.. one of the primary qualities of Divine Feminine energy.
“Your power is in the Light that you are. And your capacity to bring your Light is yours to develop. ”
Getting Started in Developing your Capacity for Inquiry
So how do you get started?
First, let's shift our idea of what curiosity is, and begin to think of it as the lantern you bring to any situation, action, decision. Building capacity for inquiry is an easy practice to get started, and once you start asking the questions you will be well on your way to freedom.
Try this Exercise
Try the following exercise to begin building your curiosity power!
Grab a blank piece of paper, or a journal page.
Start with your daily routine and identify the big chunks of your day, the parts you know by heart.
Your morning routine. Your work routine. Your dinner time. Your bedtime.
Trace your activities, examining the decisions that you make on what to do and when.
What time do you wake up? How do you get ready for the day? How do you spend your lunch hour? What about your weekends and your free time?
As you trace your day, at the key decision points (I think of these as the ones really on auto pilot that take up large bits of time or deprive me of doing something I may really want to do! ) ask yourself:
Why am I doing...XXX...?
Who said I had to...XXX...?
What would happen if I didn't...XXX...?
Remember: Your power is in the Light that you are. And your capacity to bring your Light is yours to develop. Once you begin bringing Light to everything in you and then around you, I guarantee life will never be the same, in all the very best ways!
Sharing with you in Love and Light,
Heather
